Reality TV is is one of my guilty pleasures and Bravo has a knack for
putting a competition show, so I was thrilled when I heard about the first season of
Top Design. It suffered from many of the pitfalls of any
reality-show debut--a mishmash of questionably talented contestants, some production
issues--but it was still pretty darn fun. I have clear memories of the
last four designers (Andrea, Goil, Carissa, and Matt) and (surprisingly
strong) opinions on each. And the judging panel was pretty top-notch,
too: Margaret Russell, editor of Elle Decor; the
inimitable potter and designer Jonathan Adler; and Kelly Wearstler,
whom I'm not terribly fond of but who's fun to watch in that her outfit tends to be a train wreck. Season One was also hosted by Todd
Oldham, who is perfect in every way.
But oh, Season Two is just not doing it for me. Oldham has been
relegated to doing some designer cheerleading for a few minutes an
episode, and India Hicks (daughter of legendary British designer David
Hicks) has been brought in, presumably to fill the "blond with an
accent" host-type that's worked so well for Project
Runway. India Hicks may be a lovely person, but I loathe her
one-note "island style," her designer-by-birthright credentials, and
her contribution to the show in general. Plus, unlike Oldham, she isn't
BFF with Amy Sederis, she didn't write Handmade
Modern or edit the Places/Spaces book
series (all of which are available at Frank & Margaret, by the way).
Designer-wise, the field is mostly forgettable. Many of last season's archetypes make a reappearace (wacky Asian
guy! loud inexperienced girl!). The only standouts are the recently
departed Wisit (aforementioned WAG); Eddie, the bitchy creative
director for Martha Stewart Living; and
whatshername, Ricky Schroeder's wife. Of course there's also the guy
who's won a bunch of challenges, but we can't remember his name, can
we?
Not only are these designers forgettable, they simply aren't that good.
Don't get me wrong: I would be eliminated in about two seconds were I
to appear on Top Design. I wouldn't even make it to
the first judging--after screwing up painting a wall so badly on the
first day I'm sure the producers would whisk me away and the editors
would cut all my footage. As with most reality series, Top Design doesn't really judge which contestant is
the best in his or her field, it judges who performs well under tight
deadlines, who can motor through the grunt work and still have enough
time to add her inimitable touch, and who can present his work in the best light. The skill set required to win this
show is wide-ranging. But still, Natalie, the fabulous art student who
works at the store on Friday and Saturday, can style a room better and
faster than these people. (If you ever drop by and notice a
particularly inventive or well-balanced display, you're probably
looking at Natalie's work.)
In summary, I remain puzzled. Top Chef is an
outstanding show and we can't even taste the food, so I'm unsure why a
field that lends itself to the visual can't produce a better reality
show. But don't worry, Bravo: I'm still watching. As long as Todd
Oldham still sooths the designers with his vaguely kindergarten-teacher
voice and Jonathan Adler still enthralls us with his scores of facial
expressions.
